Matt & Elka

How We Met

There was no meet-cute.

Matt and Elka met on OkCupid, an online dating site that uses data - not swiping - to match singles, swingers and polyamorous couples together.

To break the ice, Matt sent Elka a thoughtful, witty first message that made it clear that he had read her profile through to the very end. After 25 pages-worth of correspondence, Elka informed Matt that she was looking for a date, not a pen pal, and the two decided to move the conversation from online to IRL (that’s “in real life”).

After they shared calendars and established that they were both extremely popular, busy people, they set their first date for Saturday, November 2, 2013.

They met the previous Tuesday.

Their first date was at Perry’s, a San Francisco establishment known for it’s burgers, well drinks and proximity to Elka’s (old) office. Elka had a gin and tonic. Matt had a beer. Sparks flew, cynicism was exchanged and both parties acknowledged that they were just as attractive as their profile pictures. After a couple of drinks, Elka took Matt up to her office to show off the view of the Bay Bridge - and give him an opportunity to kiss her. He told her the view was nice. 

Neither wanted the date to be over, so Elka walked Matt home; and they say chivalry is dead. 

They kept talking in Matt's lobby (He invited her up for tea. She declined, saying she never did "tea" on a first date. He still claims "tea" meant "tea.") until finally, they both acknowledged it was way too late for a school night. Elka ordered a Sidecar (yes, that was back in the days when Sidecar was still a respectable way to get home) and as she approached the car she yelled across the street, "You could have kissed me you know!"

Matt decided he was going to play it cool, and wait a couple of days before he got back in touch. He texted her 30 seconds after she got into the Sidecar (which was driven by none other than the Sausage King of San Francisco. If that's not a good omen, we don't know what is.)

They’ve been inseparable ever since.

Yadda, Yadda, Yadda....How We Got Engaged

Fast forward to September 2015 and Matt and Elka had been together for just shy of two years. They were visiting NYC to eat good food, see some shows, and visit friends and family. Unbeknownst to Elka but knownst to Matt, there were games afoot.  It was supposed to be a simple Sunday: lunch, a quick stroll through Central Park and a trip to the MoMA.  But Matt had other plans.  

Burning a hole in his pocket was a ring that Matt had purchased (and received approval from Katie, Elka's future bridal associate and close friend).  He suggested they take a row boat out on the Central Park pond.  After a brief wait in line for a boat rental, Matt paid his $15 deposit for a sturdy vessel and two oars and they set off.  

Elka took her role as "navigator" very seriously, while Matt, a man of moderate to slightly-less-than-average strength executed the hard labor of rowing.  Emphatic that we could be a better rowing team than the average couple, Elka provided stern and non-negotiable orders, "paddle more on the left side!" or "we need to pass this family, they're slow!"  With Matt's modest effort and Elka's aggressive supervision, they made it out onto the open water.  

After rowing once around the pond, Matt suggested that they take a break and just drift for a while.  They made casual conversation, discussing this and that and plans for the rest of the day.  Then Matt decided to steer the conversation towards a more romantic tone, "Where do you see us in thirty years?"  Elka, a practical and modern woman, had no time for romance.  She immediately delved into the practicality of being a two income household, the importance of saving for the [future] children's college tuition and the possibility of home ownership.  Matt countered with a more romantic story about growing old together, that their children would be much smarter, cooler and better looking than the average child, and that the most important thing would be that they were still together.  Elka agreed.  So Matt concluded with a simple, "Want to make that official?"

"What?" Elka replied.  Matt went for his pocket and took out the ring, grasping it firmly to ensure that it didn't end up at the bottom of the Central Park pond.  "No!" she exclaimed in disbelief (Seriously, Elka's first words were "NO!" when Matt was about to propose).  Matt took out the ring and presented it to Elka, making a short but carefully rehearsed speech about what she meant to him, about how he wanted the ring to symbolize a promise that they would endure the ups and downs of life together and that there was no other partner in life he would rather have. 

Elka, seeing something shiny, grabbed the ring, cried and was extraordinarily happy.  "So is that a yes?" Matt asked.  "YES!" Elka said.  "I think I'm supposed to put that on you then," Matt said.  Elka gave Matt the ring back for a moment so he could put it on her finger.  They spent the next hour bobbing on the pond calling family and some close friends to tell them the news.  Upon finding out that Opa, Elka's grandfather, had also celebrated his engagement to Elka's grandmother 70 years earlier at Tavern on the Green, a restaurant in Central Park, they returned the boat (Matt even got his $15 deposit back!  It was a very successful day.) and went to have a champagne toast at the restaurant.  

They decided that getting married once simply wasn't enough, so they set June 5, 2016 as the date for their first wedding in New Jersey and October 13, 2016 for their second wedding (incidentally, to each other) in Tel Aviv.